We just went to film, to begin with, but the guy we wanted to film wasn't ready and we ended up just getting a whole series of shots of both the building and the steampunk stuff they has set up inside. I'm not sure if you've seen the Carclew building from inside the grounds, but it's incredible. I'm almost angry about how good that building looks. It is a sexy building. It's almost like when you see a girl walking down the street, and her whole face just kind of... works together, as a team, to make her look her best, and you're left thinking 'How the hell is that fair?'

Moving on.

So we got a couple of interviews, one with Steve, one with Christian, and one with Queen Victoria, the longest reining British monarch of all time (she was lovely,) and spent at least two hours staring at the armoury, which included several ray-guns, a tommy-gun, a crossbow with a bayonet and a minigun the size of my own head, before walking outside to discover Andy.

Now, in each and every interview we'd done, we'd asked questions about how heavily tonight's event would involve literary and historical characters, and every single time, the interviewee would say 'Oh, we've got Sherlock Holmes, Queen Victoria... Nicola Tesla...'

They gave the part to Andy. He didn't even bring any direct-energy weapons with him, for which I berated him heavily, because why else would he be there? For his Serbian accent? I don't think so.

Ari and Aidan turned up a few minutes later, and it seems Aidan had taken it upon himself to make a whole series of brass gears, which both he and Ari were wearing more or less everywhere. Ari, can I just say, had outdone herself in terms of costuming. She was wearing pieces of clothing I don't even have names for. 's very cool.

Adam and I could only stay if we were wearing proper clothing that fitted with the costumes being worn, and while Adam was wearing a nice shirt and suit pants, I was wearing torn jeans, ripped shoes and my checked Anarchist shirt, so I had to spend half an hour standing out on the street waiting for my parents to arrive with my suit, which I had to try and put on in a public toilet WHILE NOT LETTING ANY PART OF IT TOUCH EITHER THE WALLS OR THE FLOOR. I deserve a bloody medal...

Once this suit was on, I had to try and stick one of Aidan's brass gears onto my tie, so I went the green room to try and find a tie-pin. (Look, let's get this straight. I know a lot about suits, okay? So if I use some words you don't understand... get stuffed. That said, you should all be able to work out what a tie-pin does.) There wasn't a tie-pin, so the NATIONAL PRESIDENT OF THE COSTUMERS' GUILD sewed it on for me. She was talking to Queen Victoria. It was all a little weird. The night continued.

Now, the bit where we got attacked by Space Pirates was the best. Mainly because one of the butlers shouted 'My god! Everyone with weapons, please form a blockade in front of this door!' He looked a little surprised when over half the people there pulled out rayguns and moved in front of the door. I didn't even see the pirates for all the tophats in the way.

Plus, there was a brain in a jar, so everything was awesome.

There were a couple of problems, though. First off, you can't talk to anyone, because they all have to stay in character. I spent half the night referring to Andy as 'Mr Tesla'. Every time you want to talk to a girl, you have to kiss their hand. It gets old after a while.
As well as that, no-one could understand that I wasn't actually... 'there' so people... well, nerds, kept trying to talk to me in ridiculous accents. Eventually, I'd have to go 'I'm not in character' and they'd look very sheepish and scurry away. This happened, like, six times.

Eventually, we just went home. But it was awesome, and the maids were friendly. I don't mean that in a dirty way, I just mean they were funny and they gave me scones. I'd go next year.